Tuesday 26 June 2012

A mother's work is never done

Women have many roles in life.  There are many facets of being a woman and we are given many titles in life.

A few of my ‘titles’ are -   

* Daughter
* Sister
* Niece
* Granddaughter
* Friend
* Fiancée
* Mother

My newest ‘title’ is mother.

Becoming a mother and having a child has changed my life.  My priorities have changed and things that were once important to me are no longer that important.  Sleep, peaceful baths, leaving the house in under 5 minutes, nights out…are all things I took for granted before becoming a mummy but the joy and love little man gives me means so much more to me.  I no longer have just myself to think and worry about, I have my little family and I put my little man first.  Little man is my world.

Now that I am a mum myself I appreciate now more than ever what my mum has done for me as I now know how diverse and complex the role of being a mum is and how she put me and my sister first. 

The job of looking after your child begins during pregnancy.  During pregnancy you care for and nourish your unborn baby as they grow inside of you and from birth you are responsible for your beautiful little baby.  You love and take care of your child. 

I naively never realised how complex the ‘job’ of raising a child is but now that I am a mum and experiencing motherhood for myself I now realise the brilliant job parents do in raising their children.  I have been told a few times that I am a ‘natural’ mum and even though I have moments of self-doubt and wish I was doing a better job for little man I realise that I am doing the best by little man and that I am a capable, loving mum.

I love spending time with little man, having fun playing but sometimes I get lost in his world and my list of jobs gets forgotten.  There never seems to be enough time in the day to deal with the list of jobs and tasks which are endless.

Mums (I know that dads do lots of jobs too) have so much to do as parents for their children and their family and the jobs they do are extremely varied.  I used to sympathize with parents when they would tell me about their sleepless nights and looking after their little ones but it wasn’t until I became a mum myself that I could truly empathise and relate.  Some of my job roles are –

Child carer.  
24 hours a day 7 days a week I am on duty to attend to my little man.  Even when I am peacefully sleeping and dreaming sweet dreams I am not “off the clock” as in a seconds notice, at the sound of little man crying, I am awake and looking after little man.  I entertain and take care of him every day.  He is a major part of my day and is the centre of my world.

Personal chef.  
You guide your baby through their journey with food as they begin their adventure into food when they start weaning.  I am little man’s personal chef, making his meals and providing him with a varied diet; filling his tummy with lots of tasty, healthy food.

I am the little man’s personal nurse.  I clean up sick, give medicine, fight through colds, the flu and bugs to take of my little family who are stricken with illness, administer cuddles and kisses to help make it better and am a super boo boo healer.

Mrs Mop.  
I ensure our home is kept clean and tidy.  I am the washing queen, the duchess of drying and iron lady.  My washing machine is constantly on the go, working through the piles of washing and my beautiful cloth nappies.

Cloth queen.  
As my role as Mrs Mop I wash and dry my beautiful cloth nappies, after which I get the nappies ready for use, stuffing the pocket ones so they are ready for action.  As well as this duty I am also chief nappy changer, giving little man a lovely clean bum with some beautiful fluffy cloth giving him a gorgeous big bum look.

Personal Stylist.  
I buy little man his lovely clothes.  I adorn him in suitably cute outfits to make him look gorgeous. 

Pampering Pro.  
Little man has lovely baths followed by relaxing massages.  I also ensure his golden locks stay silky smooth by washing his hair with products that contain natural ingredients.

Family PA.  
I deal with dull paperwork and tedious phone calls.  I have the joy of filling in any forms and paperwork that needs dealing with especially as Lee is useless at paperwork.

CEO of the household.  
I organise and make sure things are running smoothly for our household.  I try to ensure all other jobs are kept on top of and delegate jobs to poor old Lee.

Finance manager.  
I deal with our family budget.  I am responsible for paying the not so welcome bills that arrive in our post box.  I try to get the most for our money, for example I try to save by getting money off and savings on our shopping, sourcing cheaper car insurance when our insurance is up for renewal by comparing different car insurance companies, buying second hand clothes and toys from ebay and charity shops, making use of things like Boots points and Tesco clubcard and the Tesco clubcard exchanges to get products for free using my points and buying products from the cheapest retailer after searching online for the best price.

For little man’s crucial early learning I try my best to stimulate, entertain and educate him in various ways and like to give him activities and toys that help encourage his learning of new skills  I currently specialize in Nursery Rhymes, abc’s and 123’s.  I like to encourage art and craft, language and music plus lots more.  I like to make learning fun for little man, using singing, dramatic story telling and fun activities to make learning fun.  I try to encourage learning of skills (and as he gets older teaching good manners and morals too) in everyday life, using everyday situations to encourage learning, for example learning numbers and language.   

Body guard. 
I would do anything to protect little man.  I guard him with my life.

Kiss and hugs expert.  
This is my most favourite job of being a mummy, I love the beautiful cuddles and kisses I get from my little man.  I love nothing more than to be cwtched up with him, gazing down at my beautiful boy in awe.

In a few years I am sure other job roles will be in force.  We will be little man’s taxi service, taking him here, there and everywhere.  He already sits in the back in his Babyweavers car seat looking very important as he is chauffeured around.  I don’t think it will be long before I am an Anger management specialist dealing with toddler tantrums and later on in life teenage tantrums and hormones.  Little man already has his little moods and stamps his little feet when he doesn’t get his own way or hears the word ‘no’……think he is going to be a handful.  As a parent I will become a child psychologist; delving into problems, helping to solve them and understanding behaviour and trying to help as best as I can.  One job I look forward to is Scary Monster Officer, reassuring little man and getting rid of any scary monsters so he can sleep soundly in the knowledge that no scary monsters are lurking under the bed or in the cupboard.

Even though most days (everyday) I am completely exhausted and drained by the end of day I love being a mummy more than anything in the world.  It is the best ‘job’ in the World.  I may have to do my mum jobs without holidays, sick days, raises, awards or appraisals but I don’t mind as being little man’s mum is worth all the hard work.  I may not get paid for all the jobs I do and have no riches to show for all the hard work but being paid in hugs, kisses and love is better than any riches and anything money could ever buy. 

This quote by Mildred B Vermont captures my feelings about how worthwhile the hard work of being a mum is perfectly – “Being a full-time mother is one of the highest salaried jobs… since the payment is pure love”.

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