Friday 2 October 2020

Small Changes That Last Forever: Supercharging Your Mindset to Be a Better Parent and Person

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If we want to have a better life, we have to to work towards it. But this doesn't necessarily mean undergoing trial and tribulation. In fact, it can be a lot closer to home than you think. It can be about being kinder to yourself in certain ways and giving yourself a pass, especially when you think you need to be earning more money or you aren't functioning as the best parent in your opinion. This is where we need to supercharge our mindset. If we change our mindset, we can change our lives which has a positive impact on everyone around us as well. How can we start to supercharge our lives in this respect?

Improving Your Cognition

It sounds very complex but really it's just about stimulating your brain a little bit more. We can all benefit from the right tools to make us function better in life and when we've been told constantly that in order to get anything we've got to work hard for it, nobody mentions the importance of working smart as well! There are things that we can all do to improve our brain function. It all stems from the simplest of tools. When you are looking to function better you need to make sure you've got the things around you that will serve you well, this could be about getting the right pair of glasses or more info on how to improve your eyesight and focus.

When we feel frazzled all of the time because we are struggling to pay the bills or our children are demanding too much from us, learning to fine-tune our brains that can help us weather these difficult storms. Whenever we feel frazzled or fatigued it's important for us to take a step back sometimes, but also we need to ask ourselves if we really are engaging with everything and everyone around us. If your children tell you about your day in school and you start to switch off, is this going to benefit anybody? And in fact, this could be the perfect place to begin so we can improve our focus which will spill over into other areas of our lives. As difficult as it is to try and focus when you feel so fatigued, start small and do your best to focus for a short period of time and then gradually increase it. Don't forget, your brain is like a muscle and it needs strengthening.

Have Self-Belief

Our senses are bombarded when we have children and we may even struggle to have a conversation with our significant other over the din of computer games, crying, and every other noise known to man. And it's this eroding of our confidence that can make us feel that it's not even worth talking anymore. But when we are looking to improve our mindset, we've got to believe in ourselves first. When we have the belief that we can improve ourselves or have control over our lives, this will give us more confidence and it can help us succeed at our goals. The one trick to achieving this is simple: practice. When you don't have the skill and confidence, you can practice it. One of the great things about having children is that they will believe in you even if you don't believe in yourself. And this can be an eye-opener for some parents who have low opinions of themselves. When this little person is depending on you to do so much for them, it is this component that can instill self-belief and purpose.

Be With the People That Matter

When we start to socialise with other parents it can feel like a competition between who's got the better kids. But this is just another version of the toxic friend pool you might have had when you were younger. We tend to slot into social situations where we fulfill a certain sociological role. In short, you need to hang out with the people that make you feel good about yourself. When we hang around with people that drain us of our resources, mentally or financially, we can resent them. Sometimes we are friends with people because we've known them for a long time but those people may need to stay at arm's length and take the opportunities where we can to speak to people who will make us feel better about ourselves. That's not to say we need to find people that we should drain the life out of. When you get into the habit of helping yourself, you can help others not through reassurance but by being inquisitive and asking for advice while also giving it. Finding other parents who share this mindset can be difficult to find, but we must remember that if we are to improve our attitudes towards life, we've got to get rid of toxic people where we can.

Visualise What You Want

If you can visualise yourself doing things, you will make it a reality. Your subconscious mind cannot tell the difference between what is a thought and what is real, so by imagining what you want to be true in your life, you will slowly start to realise it. Because your mind creates associations based on how you feel and the actions you do, this is a practice that you can undertake every morning. This helps you become a different person or, at least, the person you want to be. And with any skill, it takes time but when you incorporate visualisation or positive self-talk, these can help to retrain your brain, especially if you are a parent that feels pressurised in so many aspects of life.

Learning to have a better life means working towards this. But it doesn't happen overnight. When you have the strategies to supercharge your mind, trying one or the other will point you in the right direction. It's crucial to only do one at a time. If you want to change your life, it's about making small changes that last forever.

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